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The Languages of Love

The need to feel loved is instinctive - a human’s most important goal in life is to give and receive love. Love is at the core of our every action. We are either giving love or asking to be loved. If these needs are not met our emotional health is in jeopardy and our relationships often fall apart.

IS YOUR PARTNER SPEAKING SWAHILI ? We’ve all been conditioned in different ways throughout our lives, so we have slightly different belief systems and needs in love. In a relationship love can be confusing and difficult to express. It’s important to focus on the kind of love that is essential for our own emotional health. Giving and receiving love is more than just saying “I love you”.

If you find yourself asking the question… “Why wasn’t it enough” or “Why doesn’t he/she understand me” you and your partner may be speaking different love languages. We all have different needs in a loving relationship, and unless we realise this, it’s impossible to have fulfilling relationships romantically or of any nature. If you and your partner are not communicating your love in the same way only a small amount of your communication is received which often results in uncertainly, tension and anxiety.

There are 5 ‘love languages’, or 5 ways of expressing our love for another person. It is imperative to understand your own and your partners to have a communicative and loving relationship where both partners needs are being met.

You might have been expressing your love to your partner in your ‘love language’ but not speaking their primary love language. If this is the case your actions may not have been appreciated as expressions of love. When we understand how our partner gives and receives love, we can appreciate when they express their love for us and they can appreciate and receive our love.​

Understanding the 5 love languages will have a positive impact on all of your relationships. We feel, think and act differently when we feel completely loved.

To learn more about yours and your partners primary love language, go to and take the test!

Maddy at BBetter Coaching x

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